Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Burial at sea......

I found a corpse in my bed last night. I went into my bedroom, turned down the bed and went back into the bathroom for a glass of water. When I returned there he was, dead as a doornail, lying on my pretty green and white striped sheet. I stood and looked at his pitiful carcass for a minute. Then I got nostalgic for Max. If Max was still alive he would have taken care of the body for me.   

Max and I had been together for five years, but then one day I found him floating, bloated and dead, no obvious marks on his body; he’d apparently just given up the ghost.
I heaved a sigh and picked up the deceased with two fingers.
It seemed such a waste to flush the freshly dead and still juicy midge down the sink, but hey, with no Siamese fighting fish to feed it to, unless I felt like a little extra protein in my own diet, it was the only circle of life thing I could think of to do.

20 comments:

conboyhillfiction said...

You wicked woman! Your track record of naughtiness put me right where you wanted me - gullibly anticipating murder!

Karen from Mentor said...

...giggling and giggling

*smooches suzanne*

ganymeder said...

Aha! You got me with that one; didn't you? ;)

Karen from Mentor said...

the events happened just as described cathy -- and the thought process amused me so much I thought I'd share.

*gives you a cookie*

Laura Eno said...

I wonder how many "burials at sea" there have been in modern plumbing fixtures?
As to finding anything dead between the sheets...ewww. :)

Karen from Mentor said...

I've always been a bury your dead kind of gal when we're talking pets smaller than the palm of your hand. I figure the waste water disposal plant has enough to contend with. But you know what's worse than finding a dead bug in your bed Laura? Accidentally digging up a previous resident's pet in your garden.

Thanks for stopping in sweetpea. MUCH appreciated.
:0)

Linda Cassidy Lewis said...

But of course!

Another play-with-your-brain Karen special, well done. :-)

Karen from Mentor said...

why thank you miz lewis. *beams a bit* I appreciate the compliment.

[runs off on a tangent....]

I'm shutting my imagination down before it gets a chance to think about actually playing with a brain. Seems like it would be awfully squishy.





Linda Cassidy Lewis said...

I think the texture would depend on whether it was a live brain or a decaying one. [No, don't think about it.]

Karen from Mentor said...

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww..... I'm glad I read that comment AFTER lunch. but then again....maybe it was still too soon.
*looks kinda green*

shannon said...

Freshly dead and juicy??? EWEEEE!!!! I think you might need to go watch a chick flick and cleanse your brain...

decaying brains....EEWWWWWEEEE!!!

Karen from Mentor said...

hee. I didn't start the brain thingy ...we're blaming that on linda -- but I've forgiven her cuz she's cute.

max was such a cool fish Shannon. Life span was said to be about two years and he lived for five. I was pretty attached to the little guy. He had a voracious appetite. And you know how I love enthusiasm in all things.

Thank you for stopping in you sweet thing you.

*smooch*

KjM said...

"Burial at sea..." *snort*

And, of course, Ms. Karen would be the kind to have had Siamese fighting fish.

Mistress of Misdirection are you. Much fun.

Karen from Mentor said...

*basks in your glee...*

I'm going to immediately go out and get a tee shirt silk screened with the words "Mistress of Misdirection"

*hugs kevin til he makes a distressing squeaking noise*

Maryann Miller said...

At first I expected a dead spider. That is what I found in my bed once. I think one of my cats killed it and left it for me. "See what I did for you?" They know how I hate spiders.

estrella05azul said...

I had a feeling this was going to be another amazing only-Karen-knows-how-to-write piece of flash where you nicely have us readers exactly where you want us, then revealing the unanticipated :-)
Loved it!

Karen from Mentor said...

I wanted you to come back from hiatus to something new from me Estrella, so I put this little ditty together pretty much just for you. And the best part is it's a true story start to finish.

btw....

The parade welcoming you back online will be underway as soon as I can get all the clowns stuffed into their tiny car.

Happy to have you back!!!
*smooch*

Karen from Mentor said...

@ Maryann -- maybe your cat is trying some of that newfangled "immersion" therapy -- you know where you face your fears a little at a time?

cats can be ever so considerate that way.

[thanks for stopping in m'lady -- much appreciated]
:0)

Laurita said...

Freshly dead and juicy is delightfully gross. :)

Karen from Mentor said...

It's so funny that I feel the same way when I come across a fruit fly visiting my kitchen Laurita. The human brain gets used to performing certain tasks and after you've spent five years feeding a greedy little omnivore -- you have a knee jerk reaction to tiny bugs. In my case the reaction would be-- tiny flying bugs belong in Max's tummy -- I'm pretty sure that instead of training him to eat from my hand -- he had trained me to feed him anything small [and yes juicy] enough for him to digest...*giggling*

thanks for stopping in!!
*hugs Laurita*