Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Shoulda used a staple….

The things you think of afterwards…. This morning I made two teeny tiny pieces of toast from the end of a loaf of bread. I mushed them together a bit, stacked them upright into the corner of the toaster slot and pushed the lever down. They toasted a treat, but when I tried to get them out, one had slid through the grips almost down to the crumb tray. Luckily after unplugging the toaster and foraging around for a bit with a knife and fork I got it out.

Afterwards I realized that if I'd only stapled them together I would have had one piece of toast large enough for the other Who's mouses.

Realizations:

  1. Hindsight is 20/20
  2. A staple can suffice where duct tape dare not go
  3. I really need to go to the grocery store


 

21 comments:

Marisa Birns said...

That's why I use a toaster oven. The bread gets a nice lie down and doesn't have to emulate a jack in the box.

So don't need staple there. But sunglasses? Bread demands it while it tans.

Karen from Mentor said...

But however do you disguise the melted plastic aftertaste?

*picturing Marisa's toast wearing pink star shaped sunglasses with glitter*

Alan W. Davidson said...

I'm thinkin' you should have dipped them in eggs and made a very thin French toast. I advise #3 for this afternoon.

Karen from Mentor said...

hmmmm, Alan, your plan would require both eggs and syrup of some sort... *looks in fridge* ... um...nope...

#3 underway as soon as I put on my cape...

Laura Eno said...

When my son was in 3rd grade he fixed the hem of his pants with a milliontytwo staples while at school. I was proud of him for thinking out of the box.

You REALLY need to go to the store...but I have a whole loaf of frozen bread that you can have...if you drive here...but the store might be closer.

shannon said...

oh, you poor thing! Break from editing and go get something to eat besides squished together, toasted crumbs! lol (Says the girl who needs to go to the store, too but is existing on coffee today) :-)

Cat Connor said...

You scare me. At least you turned the toaster off before foraging about inside it with a knife!!

Go to the store!!! :D

Laurita said...

Edible toast glue. Someone needs to invent that right now. It's too late for Karen, but someone else's toast could be saved. Won't somebody think of the breakfast!

Cathy Olliffe-Webster said...

I love the little bread ends toasted.
They're like flat croutons.

Karen from Mentor said...

Croutons for breakfast. Hmmm. Seems like to get the most out of that experience you'd want to float them in a bowl of beer.
I do believe that's a standard frat house recipe Cathy...let me check and get back to you.

Karen from Mentor said...

@Laurita, what a good idea...edible toast glue....but now my thoughts are pinballing between remembering the kid in 4th grade who ate elmer's glue all the time, and wondering why I didn't think to put a little peanut butter on the edges of my wee bread bits to stick them together.

Again with the hindsight thing.

*makes a note for next time*

thanks.

Karen from Mentor said...

It was a knife AND a fork Cat. The knife was thin enough to start the process of bringing the wayward bread up out of the innards of the toaster, but wouldn't bring it out, and the fork was too fat to begin the job, but finished it off nicely. So, between the two they licked the platter clean...oh no, wait that was jack sprat and his wife. The knife and fork just helped me get the bread out, there was no licking of any kind that I know of going on. [what the knife and fork do in the drawer on their own time isn't any of my business]

And you and Shannon will be happy to know that I did go to the store yesterday and fill my larder, and I did walk in the park, and THEN I did SPEND TODAY FINISHING THE RUSH NON FICTION EDIT I'VE BEEN BURIED UNDER

*handsprings handsprings handsprings*

:0)

Karen from Mentor said...

Milliontytwo is now part of my lexicon Laura.

*looks delighted*

Thank you for that. And thanks for the offer of frozen bread, but um...pretty long road trip. Now if you're offering cabana boys...might reconsider.

*looks expectant*

Cat Russell said...

Somehow, stapled toast just doesn't seem like a good idea to me. Guess I'm not much of a visionary... :)

Karen from Mentor said...

Well, I would have pulled the staple out before eating it.

If I was going to have something metal showing up on an x-ray of my stomach, I'd want it to be something weird enough that the doc would be compelled to take the x-ray with him to cocktail parties.

Anonymous said...

Laughing... if presented with this as a hypothetical situation, these are exactly the realizations I would've imagined you'd have ;)

Missed you so much, huge squishy hugs!

J. M. Strother said...

Don't overlook the usefulness of a pop-rivet gun.
~jon

Kris said...

Okay, now I'm going to spend the rest of the day thinking of things I can ingest that would be interesting enough for doctors to take to cocktail parties. Any recommendations?

KjM said...

Well darn it!

Oh was that a pun? I'm *sure* I didn't mean it.

*snicker*

Karen from Mentor said...

@Kris: I think swallowing a grandfather clock or a bicycle sprocket would do it.

And you'd get to say "sprocket" a bunch of times, which is alway an added bonus in my book.

Karen from Mentor said...

SOOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY to have you home Estrella!!!! Can't wait for the pictures of your trip.

@ Jon-- I like the way you think.

@ Kevin I actually have a darning needle.
[it came in a package of assorted sewing essentials]
And I know a guy who wears one in his lip, but I don't actually know HOW to darn.... so...*sigh* don't think I could darn toast.

I could damn it to hell though if that works for you.