I woke up today, looked at my alarm clock/digital calendar and to my surprise it's two weeks later than it ought to be.
I noticed something else pretty strange right away, although in those first few minutes I thought that I was still dreaming. But nope, after I stumbled into the bathroom and splashed my face with water I looked in the mirror and to my astonishment found that yes, somehow, while I was sleeping, I sprouted four long lavender spotted tentacles from my ribcage and ankles. After the initial what the heck moment and the requisite time spent trying to remember anything about the last couple of weeks, I adjusted to the idea, and in the next hour or so I decided that having tentacles is actually pretty cool. And truthfully, the tentacles at my ankles seem like they'll be handy since they sport these really long prehensile toes at the ends. I spent about twenty minutes just dropping and picking up dimes on the tile floor in my bathroom with them. Then I found out that I could use them to type while I ate a bowl of cheerios. What a delightful surprise.
I could do without whatever seems to be trying to rupture its way out from between my shoulder blades though because it itches like a mother. If I use two mirrors, I can see it moving around under there, but whatever it is hasn't quite made it through the skin as of yet.
I hope that when it finally emerges it's another tentacle; but one with fingers. It'll be ever so handy for spiking my hair.
So, did I miss anything?