Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Don’t bug me…..

Some days it's harder than others to adhere to Buddhist principles. I feel that every living creature has value. But when you chase a carpenter ant around your closet for ten minutes, finally catch it and then it just keeps running up and down the inside of the window screen panicking instead of tightly holding onto its towel and calmly going out of the open window you've so nicely provided for it…..

Well…. patient acceptance can wobble a little bit.

As it can when you catch a wolf spider, carefully toss it out your front door and before you've gone two steps it squeezes back inside under the crack, runs across the room, and promptly hides behind your refrigerator.

Both these things happened on Saturday within minutes of each other. Apparently Saturday was Come on inside and live in Karen's house day and I didn't get the memo.

I'm reporting a 50/50 freedom result here. The ant eventually made it to the great out of doors to frolic with others of its ilk. The last time I saw the spider it was inside a vacuum cleaner bag with a lot of dust bunnies, so I'm hoping he doesn't have allergies.

Just so you don't think I'm heartless, I'll confide that I did rip a hole in the vac bag when I threw it out. I also put a bigger weather strip under my front door. The second part was just in case Mr. Wolf Spider thought he'd come wandering back in after he's crawled around in all the rotten banana peels in the dumpster.

The damn things NEVER wipe their feet. And I hate when I wake up to sticky footprints everywhere.

23 comments:

Cathy Olliffe-Webster said...

Man, I didn't get the memo either. You're a lot nicer to unwanted guests than I am. Allergies would be the least of Mr. Wolf Spider's problems at my house. (cue evil laugh)

Marisa Birns said...

The other thing about wolf spiders is that when one invites them to sit at the breakfast table, they talk while they're eating. Not appetizing to see a fly being chewed up.

And I see that we need to let Cathy know when we're visiting. Don't know what she would smack us with if we fall under "unwanted" guest category.

Karen from Mentor said...

Do you have the obligatory spider head mounted on a stick at your front door to serve as a warning to the others?

...cuz then it's just their own damn fault if they come in

[spider daredevils beware the wrath of Cathy]

Karen from Mentor said...

Marisa snuck in there while I was answering Cathy. *waves at Marisa*

I always ring twice at Cathy's house. Just like the postman.

Thank you ever so much for the image of flies being chewed. My sausage link is much tastier for adding that visual to my breakfast.
[looks a bit green]

Laura Eno said...

I'm with Cathy...my motto is "You can move freely about the great outdoors, but you're dead meat if you enter my house." I have that on a sign on my door too. I haven't had any human houseguests for a while either, so it must work.

Laurita said...

I scared the cat laughing at your last line, although wolf spider sounds terribly frightening to me.

I once found a carpenter in my kitchen. I chased it all over the room (he was a slippery thing), finally caught it, and had it at the door when he explained that my husband asked him to come fix the cabinets. Boy was my face red.

Karen from Mentor said...

That would also make a great slogan for an "unwelcome" mat Laura.

I'll ring THREE times when I come to your house .. Then I'll put the offering plate of cookies in first, and wait to see if you turn off the laser beams....

Karen from Mentor said...

*wonders why the carpenter was slippery*

Cheesy 70's music plays for a bit...

*Gets slapped by Cher*

Somehow you scaring your cat laughing at me talking about not being mean to insects seems appropriate in a weird convoluted way Laurita.

[but that may just be my brain still feeling off kilter after Marisa made me picture spiders talking with their mouths full of flies]

Do you think you could get the carpenter you caught to make Marisa's spider a teeny breakfast chair?

Laurita said...

I think you need to write a poem about slippery carpenters. *Bow-chicka-wow*

Karen from Mentor said...

ROFL....

if I do, I'll put it at InkNode.....

oh man that was funny. Thanks.

Cat Russell said...

I like your style. :)

I have a live and let live motto too when it comes to insects and arachnids. If I can catch them without getting hurt or if I can catch them at all, out they go to live their little buggy lives. But yellow jackets and ants, there's just no way I can catch them or not be hurt by them so I end up having to kill them. :(

I wouldn't worry about the spider's allergies though. I've heard most spider's have dust allergies, so I'm sure he has a paper mask filter to breathe through before he exits the vacuum bag hole to the great outdoors... :D

Karen from Mentor said...

That's a fun image. But I'm trying to figure out how he'd hold the mask on without ears.
Oh, probably a whole head elastic band ...

doi..what was I thinking? It's just funny nose and glasses that you need ears for.

Reason #213 Why aliens don't like our joke shops

shannon said...

*giggling* My twins have learned my policy of 'if it's moving, it goes outside'. Sooo...they pick the creepy crawlers up and bring them to me to make sure they're moving. If I scream and jump on the couch, they know they can put it outside.

(going to have nightmares about giant sneezing spiders)

Karen from Mentor said...

jeez...I'm going to have nightmares about your lovely twins bringing you something so big they have to carry it to you together.

*shudder*

Alan W. Davidson said...

Very noble, trying to save the wee creatures. Just be thankful the sticky footprints were only spiders and not elephants.

Karen from Mentor said...

Ah, no Alan, Elephants only leave footprints in my butter.

Jodi MacArthur said...

Oh you lovely woman. I feel like a serial killer now. I used to do that, but there are simply too many bugs in my house. The house is old and full of cracks. One thing I do let live are the little geckos. They eat the bugs I don't get, and I think that is pretty damn cool.

Loved this post. You are so cute!

Karen from Mentor said...

I'd enjoy geckos skittering about in my house Jodi. I wouldn't enjoy them half dried up in a slipper under my bed-- which is where I found a newt that escaped from my fish tank once-- but geckos running around free range eating flies/spiders would be cool. Not much chance of it with our Ohio winters, but a girl can dream....

Anonymous said...

My gosh you, and your house-guests, made me laugh aloud, and my laptop is quite lucky I decided to drink that glass of water later.
But you know... you should really build them a bug house since they like it so much in your apartment :)

*waves, avoiding admitting to how freaked out she would've been at the sight of the spider and how annoyed at the sight of the ant* :P

Karen from Mentor said...

I think they think my house is their house Estrella.

There's probably a sign on the door at spider height that says mi casa is su casa only in spider.

The lady that lived here before me was rather on the occult side.

kathryn said...

Ew. Ew. Ew. My rule of thumb is this: If it's too big to squish (w/o my needing hypnotherapy to eradicate the endless sound it continues to make in my head during said squish)then it must be captured in a plastic Chinese food container, covered and brought no less than 100 years from my dwelling. Then the plastic container has to go into the recycling...'cause....ew.

Your vacuum idea sounds easier.

Karen from Mentor said...

It was.
And now I have that sound from Men in Black when Will Smith squished the cockroach ringing about in my skull.

ew...ew....and I'll raise you an eek.

Jen said...

I know exactly what you mean. When I began living by Buddhist ideas, spiders in my bathtub were one of the most confusing parts of the process. Also, mosquitoes.