Yesterday I revisited a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon where Calvin asks Suzy if being a girl is like being a bug. I started to idly wonder about that in an abstract way. After a while the latent scientist in me prodded me to see if I could find a more concrete way of figuring out the issue.
I just spent an hour stretched out on my stomach on the floor of my kitchen listening to a bug explain to me what it's like to be a bug.
Answer?
It's nothing like being a girl.
Just FYI.
16 comments:
You're very patient...I would have squished him.
I didn't know you could speak bug. My awe of you grows and grows.
I'm glad that I can speak bug Laurita, because I just wrote myself a note in bug language that says:
"If you reincarnate as a bug, don't go to Laura Eno's house" ....
It seems to me that the fever is telling you stranger things than the bug...
I was mostly just listening to the bug while he conversed with the scientist in me. They really hit it off, so I let the scientist out. The last time I saw them they were arguing and drawing three dimensional diagrams on the kickplate under my sink.
Well at least it could've offered to make you a hot cup of tea and take the talking to the table... wait... bugs on the table? No, I'm with Laura on this one ;)
It's exactly like being a bug. First I net you, then I pin you, then I extract the wings, then the antennae -- what, it's not like this for everyone?
Interesting John. I had no idea you were so kinky. I prefer silk cording myself, but... to each his own....
I wouldn't want a bug to make me tea Estrella. For one thing? My teacups are in a pretty tall cupboard and I don't think a bug would be able to reach them without a ladder. And as you know my kitchen is teeny, adding a ladder just seems like an accident waiting to happen.
Or hilarity would ensue.... but only clowns think comedy with ladders is funny.... and I'm afeared of clowns.
*shudders at the idea of clowns in her kitchen*
by the way? Someone found Miscellaneous Yammering yesterday by searching for:
"Erotic clown transformation" ....hee hee hee
You're weird Karen, which is one of the reasons I like you and your stories. ;)
Do you think you could teach bug language?
Would your bug like to come and play with Peter? Oh sorry that's right -there was the unfortunate accident, Peter fell down the plug hole. Stupid spider, I told him and told him not to dangle under the tap. I knew someone would turn it on... I just never thought it would be me.
I'll admit to crafting my entire life's philosophy around Calvin and Hobbes. I'll also admit to having a little stuffed cat well beyond the age such things are deemed appropriate by society. Said stuffed cat MAY still be in my house.
Also, do you know what kind of disgusting things would be stuck to my body if I laid down on my kitchen floor? Do you know that two years ago I spilled a container of Instant Oats and I'm still finding them?
...laughing...*shuts door to mental image of disgusting things on Bryan's kitchen floor*
*peeks through fingers and points*
Although the piece of pepperoni under the edge of the fridge that dried into a really spot on likeness of Greta Garbo might garner you some bucks on ebay.
laughing at Cat too.... Spiders are a trusting lot. Poor peter he picked a peck of trouble by setting up shop near a plug hole in your house.
I'm not a fan of dangling spiders. I told two REALLY horrifying spider stories at Alan's place a couple of weeks ago. He had linked to a spider story of mine, so I upped the ante for him in the comment thread...
http://conversationsfromlandsedge.blogspot.com/2010/09/spiders-creep-me-out.html
If you go look at the link, don't say I didn't warn you.
Bwahahahahaha
:0)
Mari,
I can teach almost anything, I could probably teach you bug language. We could start with Bee dancing, and work up to the harder stuff.
I'll pencil you in for tuesday....
You bring the cookies.
:0)
Wow! That's an interesting search term to find your blog by... ;)
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